Tuesday, August 01, 2006


Recent headlines in all major newspapers have all mentioned Lance Bass coming out of the closet. Big surprise. Just recently however, another celebrity has made a stunning announcement about his sexuality. This morning Carson Kressly, who gained notoriety as the flamboyant homo on "Queer Eye", was inspired by Lance Bass, and made a shocking admission: He's straight.

"Come on guys, " said Kressly "Nobody is THAT gay."

The famous fashion guru said he felt liberated, and he's just being true to himself.

"I was born this way. I just encountered so much prejudice in the fashion biz that I felt I had to conform. Nobody believes that a straight man can be good at fashion, and that's just wrong. I mean, look at this shirt, Does that look gay to you? Oh, wait, I thought I was wearing the blue one. This one is kinda gay."

While some people applaud his courage, his costars are not pleased, and claimed:

"His fashion sense always sucked anyways. We had our suspicions he was batting for the other team ever since he accidentally made that comment about Jessica Alba and tried to play it off like he was talking about her dress, which was a gaudy monstrosity."

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